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What Can Men Do?
Most men don't commit rape, but all men can play a vital role in ending
sexual violence. Men have important roles in rape prevention and can use your
voices to challenge rape-supporting attitudes and behaviors and raise awareness
about the damaging impact of sexual violence. Every time a man's voice joins
those of women in speaking out against rape, the world becomes safer for us all.
- Define your own manhood.
Consider whether messages about manhood like, "don't take no for an
answer" play a role in creating unhealthy and unsafe relationships. Choose
what kind of man you want to be. Be a positive role model.
- Learn
about the full range of emotional, verbal, and physical behaviors some
men use to control their partners. End these behaviors in your own life and
challenge other men to end them as well. If a brother, friend, or teammate is
being abusive to their partner or women in general-don't look the other way.
Try to talk to him about it or consult a friend, a parent, counselor, or
professor.
- Talk it over.
By learning effective sexual communication-stating your desires
clearly, listening to your partner, and asking when the situation is
unclear-will make relationships safer and healthier. Create a space to speak
honestly about sex.
- Understand the ability to
consent.
Consent has to be freely given by both partners. Drugs and alcohol can
affect people's ability to decide whether they want to be sexual with someone.
If someone is "really out of it" and can't give consent, wait until you are
both ready and able to say yes.
- Talk with women
about how the risk of violence affects their daily lives or if they
know someone who has been raped. If you're willing to listen, you can learn a
lot about the impact of rape and how to stop it.
- Have the courage to look
inward.
Question your own attitudes. Try not to be defensive when something you
do or say hurts someone else. Try hard to understand how your own attitudes
and actions might inadvertently perpetuate sexism and violence and work toward
changing them.
- Mentor and teach boys
about how to be men in ways that don't involve degrading or abusing
girls and women. Teach boys to respect and value women as equals. Lead by
example.
- Show your strength.
Don't ever have sex with anyone against their will-Most men never rape,
but the overwhelming majority of rapists are male. Make a promise to be a
different kind of man-one whose strength is not used for hurting.
- Dare to dream
of a culture free of sexual violence... a rape culture transformed.
OTHER RESOURCES:
http://www.mencanstoprape.org/
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